





The Neurotic Monkey's Guide to Survival is dedicated to providing innovative ideas that will alter reality as we know it and could very well SAVE YOUR LIFE. Plus videos of people getting hit in the junk.
Sloth's Song
Takin' It Back
Piano Lessons
Tubes
I don’t intend to live long.
There’s an old joke, “What’s the best way to make God laugh? Make a plan.” I doubt that I will be lucky enough to be blessed with a timely demise. Not that I really have a strong suicidal urge (not compared to the next seriously depressed person). I simply don’t like the idea of being old and infirmed, embarrassingly relying on my loved ones to take care of me while I slowly lose my physical and mental faculties.
The reason for this semi-self-destructive diatribe is that I believe I suffered what could be a classic mid-life crisis at the age of 18. I had been accepted to college and was preparing to go there in September. But that summer, I decided to dip my toes into the craziness and try to revive my long slumbering barbaric yawp.