Rob Dean examines the overlooked, unappreciated or unfairly maligned movies. Sometimes these films haven't been seen by anyone, and sometimes they've been seen by everyone - who loathed them. This is Missing Reels.
What I want to bring back to superheroes with this project is a sense of play. Things have gotten so dreary. The heroes have gotten so ugly that even their muscles have muscles.
- Frank Miller
Ignorance is bliss. Sure, it's "better" to know the truth - but it's not always a good feeling. Here's an example: you know the song "Brown Eyed Girl" by Van Morrison? It's a sweet summer song of days gone by, right? It's about anal sex. Just listen to the lyrics: "Behind the stadium...down in the hollow...playing a new game..." Clearly it's about that special bond between a man and the first girl who lets him do it in the butt.
Or maybe it's not. This is a brilliant and hilarious thought exercise put forth by Shannon Wheeler in Too Much Coffee Man: now that you've just been exposed to this piece of information - you will always associate "Brown Eyed Girl" with butt sex. Even though things may not be true, certain bits of knowledge can never be unlearned.
Today's movie isn't about butt sex (not that I noticed, anyways) but it is about the fallacy of nostalgia. It centers on that lie put forth by regressives that, at one point in the past, there were "golden days." Don't get me wrong - there were definitely years for America that were objectively better than this current age of horrible new diseases, rampant pollution, erratic natural disasters, catastrophic economic woes. But to say that "times were better" is to imply a giant asterisk: yes, times were better if you were a white American man above a certain level of wealth. The Post-World War II era was a prosperous one for the US - but mainly due to the fact that every other country had been utterly decimated by war, bombing campaigns and more war. And sure, maybe the truthiness of growing up in the 50s was that everything felt better - but that's because people weren't informed about all the various levels of corruption in politics, pollution in the environment, exploitation of other countries, carcinogens in household items, etc.
Times were better - because most people didn't know any better. The deluge of information brought along the weariness of cynicism - but also the responsibility of knowledge. Armed with knowing as many facts about a situation as possible, the hope is that people can make informed decisions that are based on rational deliberation and not ignorance or fear. Of course, that doesn't always pan out, but the theory is sound.
But what does this all have to do with an Australian superhero parody from 1984? The Return of Captain Invincible is about an American, patriotic costumed do-gooder who went from being the beloved hero of a nation to becoming a forgotten footnote delegated to the alleyways of Australia. Alan Arkin plays the recovering alcoholic Captain Invincible, a man formerly ensconced in the flag but now lying in a puddle of his own filth. Oh...and it's a musical.
The film finds the WWII hero on the outs after being investigated by McCarthy's HUAC group, with his name dragged through the mud before he disappears from the skies and from everyone's mind. Meanwhile, the ever present Mr. Evil Midnight (Christopher Lee) - the fiend behind every horrible action in history - has recently abducted with the hypno-ray, a mind control device that the US was building...in Australia. This leads the President to corral his generals with a plan to reclaim the hypno-ray and return to the glory days of America's distant past. He does this in a two part song, by the way:
(first part of the song has NSFW language, but play it off like Tourette's)
The President then seeks out Captain Invincible and, with the aid of a pretty lady Australian cop, brings the Captain back in to find the ray and fight whoever committed this dastardly deed. Captain Invincible has problems controlling his powers as he hasn't used them in so long - which leads to some patented 80s Australian slapstick (including clothes ripping off, crotch shots - the greatest hits and main staples of 80s Australian comedy).Then the Captain goes to stop Mr. Evil Midnight's fiendish plan - which is both an incredibly stupid and creepily racist plot - as well as rediscover his love for his country.
Alan Arkin does a great job as Captain Invincible and is perfectly cast in the role. In pretty much every film, Arkin always seems to be improvising, barely recalling the script and getting "close enough" to what was written. Obviously a guy that's worked with David Mamet isn't going to improvise all the time, but Arkin has always carried this air of "what am I doing here?" which is perfect for a displaced superhero with a drinking problem who doesn't even know he's in Australia.
Christopher Lee is suitably over the top in his role as Nazi/Criminal Mastermind. In fact, his operatic approach to the character extends to his style of singing. Arkin and Lee perform this song, "Evil Mr. Midnight," when Invincible figures out that it's Midnight who's behind it all:
It's like a Pat Benatar music video made out with the goth kid from high school while the Drama Kids directed them. Also of note: Midnight has a tiny mutant dwarf henchman. It doesn't really matter or change anything, I just happen to be a huge fan of tiny mutant dwarf sidekicks who basically are just there to be odd and symbolize that the villain is creepy.
The movie veers wildly from a parody of superhero films, to a limp wristed social commentary on the fall of American Exceptionalism, to a bizarre musical with songs written by Richard O'Brien (from Rocky Horror Picture Show), to a broad type comedy that involves a shoot out in a New York Jewish deli.
But it works.
It shouldn't - it should be a huge mess, and it kind of is - but it works as this ragtag piece of schlock that director Philippe Mora married to a real sincere pining for olden days. Add in to that the singular uniqueness of the movie - with all of its disparate elements colliding into one whole film - and The Return of Captain Invincible is an example of a fearless fiasco of a movie that is original and weird and a lot of fun.